carruci carruci

I'm so excited to be in the point of pre-production when I get to assemble a look-book... it means spending too much time cutting and pasting and collecting images from all over I can use as source materials for myself and my crew members.

Today I spent some time looking at Elinor Carruci's site, and am floored by her incredible sense of lighting and composition.... check it out!

http://www.elinorcarucci.com/closer.html

movie stew!

So, after not updating this blog in literally years, I'm trying to turn the page to a new chapter in which I do things like update this blog... and go to yoga, and eat healthier, and write thank you notes :)

I'm starting with the blog.

I'm currently in LA in pre-production on a short film entitled Camera Obscura- it's based off of Miranda's book, The Effects of Light, and the film is set about 6 months before the book begins in the present day. M and I co-wrote the script, and I'm directing.

I'm so excited to be on this productive adventure... but sometimes making a film can be overwhelming! There are a million things to do, ranging from the seemingly insignificant (do we have enough granola bars on set per day for all the hungry crew?) to the seemingly HUGE (casting awesome people, securing locations, etc.,) Luckily I have an awesome DP set up, and the beginnings of a very hearty and laid-back crew.

What makes me feel very secure is that I have the help of my wonderful fellow producers, and the support of my friends and family. I was talking to my roommate about feeling overwhelmed, and she said, "oh yeah, the month before I shot my short I was insane!" So that made me feel better. Kind of.

She also offered this nugget of wisdom: Filmmaking is like brewing a giant stew where the ingredients are hard work, awesome people, and a hell of a lot of luck. Good luck I hope!

On Submission

The worst time in a writer's life, aside from the writing bit of things, and the publishing bit of things, is when a beloved book goes out on submission. Right now, my book is sitting on a number of desks out in the big bad publishing world and I am keeping my fingers crossed. I had acupuncture yesterday and my acupuncturist touched my knee and asked, "are you having obsessive thoughts?" The answer was yes. Apparently I have a weakness in my spleen. I also check my e-mail constantly, and every time my cellphone rings, I jump. You just want one person, one bold, brave person to say "yes." And of course it's more complicated than that, there are editorial boards, and financial discussions, but when you're the writer, you don't see any of that. You sit in silence and cross your fingers and try to learn patience. Sigh.  (mbw)

Help our friend, novelist Annie Dawid! Vote on her book!

Our dear friend, Annie Dawid, has been working on a novel, PARADISE UNDONE, for the past four years. It has been a struggle for her to find a publisher; even though the book is beautifully written, it is about the Jonestown Massacre. 

Annie's book has been named a semi-finalist in the Amazon Novel Breakthrough Contest, sponsored by Penguin Books; the semi-final list will be narrowed down by 2/12. The judges are looking for readers' comments to assist in their decision making. 

You can find the first ten pages of PARADISE UNDONE at the following website, where you can write an enthusiastic review by 2/12. It only took me about fifteen minutes to read, and I was thoroughly moved and enticed:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00121WDOM

Kara Walker and Barack Obama

Kai and our Papa and I went to see Kara Walker's show at the Whitney yesterday; it's closing on 2/3, and it's really worth checking out if you have the chance. Walker's work is so dark, even so disgusting at times, that I was jarred at first: fetuses falling out of orifices, excrement everywhere, rape, fellatio, incest, racial stereotypes. In another context (on TV, in a book, etc) that jarring would have been enough to make me walk away. But Walker required me to keep looking, to look beyond my knee-jerk, liberal, "it's too much to bear" attitude and explore a dialogue with her about what happened in this country during slavery, and what the legacy of that tragedy has been for all Americans up to the present. We have a cultural tendency to look away: to turn off the television when the footage of Katrina is too much for us to bear; to accept that the AP isn't actually showing us the daily body-count in Iraq. 

I was shocked to learn that when, at the tender age of 28, Walker was granted a MacArthur Foundation "genius" grant, there was a huge outcry from a number of African-American artists, a few of whom called for a boycott of the grant. In a piece at the exhibit in which Walker responds to this outcry, she levels a claim back at her detractors, who, according to Henry Louis Gates Jr. (he was whispering in my ear via a gallery guide), were particularly concerned that Walker's art would make African-Americans "look bad" to whites; Walker writes (and I'm paraphrasing here): "Final Solution: depict racial stereotypes of white people." And then, at the bottom of the page, she adds, in smaller letters: "For balance." That's the other thing I like about Walker: she's funny. And I guess you'd have to be, when such work is coming through you. Humor and darkness are interwoven; as are birth and death, love and hate. 

Walker's work also got me thinking about Obama's speech the other night after winning the South Carolina primary. Clinton's campaign has made some real missteps by trying to racialize the race for President; her assertions that Hispanics, for example, won't vote for Obama, is just one example. I liked what Obama had to say in response to that: yes, we're different, but we all want the same thing, and that's change (much less eloquent in my version). And that's what I wanted to say to the folks who feel Walker should be censored, who feel she is drumming up racial stereotypes long since buried. It's true, America doesn't do slavery anymore. It's true, Walker can only make her art in a relatively reflective world, one with distance from the horrors of slavery, and an innate distaste for the transactions that occurred during that time. But what Walker does in exploring those transactions is to ask us to look at our own lives and see the ways in which the legacy of slavery still lives on. Socio-economic disparity, the war in Iraq, the crisis in Darfur. Obama is a great candidate because he is requiring his supporters to do exactly what Walker is requiring her viewers to do: to look past their own discomfort, straight into the heart of what is wrong with America. Not because we hate this country. But because we love it. (mbw)

Sometimes People Steal From You

What has caused me the most heartache in my artistic life- and it's happened on more than one occasion- is discovering that someone to whom I've offered up my mind has taken advantage of that offering. I've discovered that kind of theft from afar, an act committed by someone whom I've never met, and it's awful. But it's a different brand of betrayal to discover such dishonesty in a person who looked me in the eye, whom I thought I had befriended, both on the personal and artistic level. I believe in a sharing of ideas. I believe in collaboration. I readily lend my mind to other people's projects, especially if it's done in the name of art-making. So it's odd, and disheartening, when a fellow artist exploits that goodwill. On good days, I try to learn something from moments like this: I resolve never to treat someone the way I have been treated. On bad days, I feel angry and small, and silenced. It's been a bad day. (mbw)

So Miranda's giving me some flack cuz I haven't posted yet.  Which is true, but honestly I dunno where oh where to start.  

oh, here's something: Our mom recently visited our grandmother up in Vermont and apparently she really really wants to see my movie.  And while I'm all for honoring the wishes of my ailing withering wasp-y grandma, I really don't think she really would like to see it.  Mainly because my movie features hundreds of people in the nude, including minors, including myself.  Oh yeah, and there's also the scenes with my ex-girlfriend, which I don't think she'll like... But maybe I'm wrong.  She does like Jackie on "the Bravo".  My mom was like, why don't you just make a different movie for your grandmother?  And then I realized probably many young filmmakers have this problem, so maybe I should capitalize on it? I could make the blandest romantic comedy short and sell it to all my friends.  Nice.  So not only would I be lying to my grandma, I'd be taking from my cohorts.  

Anyway, all of this made me realize that I'll probably never make any movie my grandmother will approve of. hmm... Is this one of those epiphanies artists talk about?  

 In our bio it says I make films, which is true, but recently I've been very far away from my work.  For the past few years I've been working on my first feature length movie, "Body of Work". It's about growing up posing for pictures (with Jock Sturges and Mona Kuhn), becoming and artist, finding an identity, and everything else. 

Trying to get back into work, and feeling like I actually have the ability to see this project to the end requires incredible feats of mental strength, weeks of sleep deprivation, and lots of emergency artichoke making (the only thing that cheers me when everything seems impossible.) Oh yeah, and Miranda kicks my butt into shape every now and then with pep talks.

So this is my first meandering post...

love to the four of you who read this.